You, like everyone else, assign value to things and experiences. Perhaps, for sentimental reasons, you cherish a toy from childhood yet, someone else may see it as junk.

HOW DO I VALUE MYSELF?

Value is often relative to context. My friend. Linda, the coauthor of this article, told me how many years ago she noticed that the mom’s in her “support group” ripped people to shreds with gossip. They gossiped about everyone.

So, one night at dinner, she said to them, “I have come to a decision that I no longer want to gossip and, in order to accomplish this, I’d like your support. So, if you hear me start to gossip, please call me on it and also don’t tell me any gossip.” … She thought she had cut off her supply and demand. Then, when she got up to go to the bathroom, by the time she hit the third step, she heard one woman say, “Who does she think she is?” She turned around and said, “I can still hear you.”

In the bathroom, she had an epiphany, “My friends suck… and so do I; because I participated. I need better friends.” She then realized that to get better friends, she needed to be a better person. “I held myself to a higher standard. I decided to upgrade the way I thought of myself and the people I chose in my life. I let go of my ‘support’ group to make room for those who value me and themselves. Today, I strive to be authentic. I don’t do things out of obligation. If I show up to your Tupperware party, I want to be there. I expect myself and my closest friends to honor themselves first and to be authentic.”

HOW DO I VALUE MY WORK?

A similar human phenomenon is that people value what they pay for and will pay more for what they value most. When someone pays dearly, they have a heightened expectation. In the case of hypnosis, counseling or coaching, a heightened expectation goes hand-in-hand with heightened results.

When people come for hypnosis help, what you offer is priceless. When you do a good job, they have a tool for life and a way to VALUE themselves. The value you assign to your work influences their results. Let’s say you were to call two hypnotists and ask, “how much is a session?” The first says “$25” and the second says “$200.” Which one would you choose?

Let’s say they come to you to quit smoking and you say “I charge $25” you will have a much lower success rate than if you say “I charge $500.” (Of course, if you were to charge $2,500, they may not be able to afford cigarettes). The price you set tells the world the value you place on your work. The money they pay puts their skin in the game. The reason hypnotists continually learn is because they always want their skills to deliver the value they promise.

CORE VALUES

Doctor David Hawkings says, “What you value is based on your instinctive and healthy needs.” So, when you tell yourself what you want, what you really, really want you reach your core value. You know you are honoring your core value because you are peaceful and proactive in your quest to make it so. It’s okay to be your best and expect others to appreciate it. Have the courage to choose to live your highest values, go to a place where you are given the value you deserve and surround yourself with people who value you.

AFFIRM: “I honor, accept and value my authentic self and act accordingly.”

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Local Personality, Shelley Stockwell-Nicholas, PhD is a hypnotherapist, mindfulness and NLP trainer, artist and the author of 25 books. She certifies practitioners through the International Hypnosis Federation. You can call her at 310 541-4844.

Linda Herrick is a Hypnosis Instructor and Reiki Master in Nashville, TN