Return to Recreation with Raised Awareness When Going Places this Summer

By Renowned Beverly Hills Manners Expert Lisa Gaché

Summer is here and we’ve been given the green light to return to recreation. After over a year without access to theatres, clubs, amusement parks, sporting events or indoor dining, we’re eager to embrace IRL experiences once again.

For most of us, however, the everyday courtesies that used to come so naturally have fallen by the wayside while we were cooped up at home out of practice for the last twelve months.

The little things we do on the daily, whether it be walking through doors or taking an elevator, escalator, or stairs, or even taking a seat, have a direct effect on others. There is a level or expectation around an agreed upon code of conduct when going to the movies, attending a live performance or sporting event or simply deciding to dine out. These written and unwritten rules are crucial to maintaining decorum when we’re out and about.

Now as we prepare to return to life post-pandemic, placing extra emphasis on how to move through it with grace, kindness, respect, and consideration may be the most important factors to guaranteeing a good time for all.

Keep to the right. On staircases, keeping to the right ensures that people can move past each other easily if space permits. On an escalator, staying to the right side allows people in a hurry to pass on the left. In either case, it is bad form to overtake another person unless absolutely necessary. If you do need to pass, be mindful and apologize for the inconvenience.

Let others out first. Let people out of an elevator before entering. Those closest to the door generally enter first. In a crowded elevator, stand as close to the wall as possible. If near the elevator buttons, take responsibility for pressing them. Avoid pushing to exit from a crowded elevator; ask politely to go past others. Similarly, if others are trying to exit, make it easy for them to move past as quickly as possible. When riding in elevators, conversation ceases or is made in a whisper so no one overhears. When an elevator stops, those closest to door exit first. Never shout for someone to hold elevator or put an arm out if another elevator is available.

Hold the door. Holding doors is an act of common courtesy which may be extended towards any person, regardless of gender, status, or age. We hold the door open as a mindful act of kindness and consideration for anyone who is older, has an obvious physical ailment or disability, or is burdened in some way or holding packages. And always remember, if someone opens a door for you, smile and say, “Thank you!”

Taking a seat. When entering a row full of people, face forward and use the magic words “excuse me” and “thank you.” If you must exit during a performance, repeat the process, but whisper thanks and apologies. If you are being passed in a row, clear space by remaining seated and turning knees in direction the person is moving or stand and lean against back of your folded seat.

The big screen. Going to the movies is different streaming a movie at home. Be on time, go to bathroom beforehand, buy snack before you sit down and finish eating before the movie begins. Talk while enjoying snacks, but end conversation once the previews start. Save all other speaking until the credits end. Sit still and do not rest feet on the back of a chair. Before exiting, collect all trash and dispose in waste containers.

Public Performances. Getting dressed shows effort and displays respect for the performance about to take place. The style of dress is determined by the nature of the event or dictated by before or after performance plans. Punctuality is key. Arrive with enough time to use the restroom beforehand. When entering the theatre, follow the usher down the aisle. If late, stand in back of the theater and wait for a natural break, scan the room for your seat or allow an usher to seat you. Time the intermission to allow for a drink of water or use the restroom to avoid rushing to return to your seat.

Audience Do’s & Don’ts. There is a no talking policy unless the performers request audience participation. Cell phones should be turned off along with any other devices with sounds that may disturb others. Food is not permitted. Avoid rattling of wrappers or slurping drinks. Control coughing. Photos and video are prohibited.

Applause & The Standing “O”. Ladies clap their hands by cupping their left hand slightly and hitting it with the fingers of their right hand. Gentlemen, hit the two hands together evenly. A standing ovation is the highest compliment possible and involves standing with the rest of the audience and clapping. Applause occurs as a group. Clap when a conductor takes their place at the podium and when a concert is completed. Clap when the orchestra plays their prelude. Applause is expected after each work, song or scene is completed. Do not applaud between parts of a piece of music.

Observing Art. Dress in casual, comfortable clothes when going to a museum. Check coats and other cumbersome belongings. Voices should remain low and walk at a similar pace of other museum goers. Do not touch the artwork and keep at least one foot of distance away from paintings and sculptures. Arrange for a tour guide or use self-guided headphones to educate yourself and elevate the museum experience.

Going to a game. Traditions and rituals set a standard. Their purpose is to remind attendees to remain civilized and participate as a spectator of the game with dignity. Show respect by standing and removing your hat when singing the National Anthem or when the anthem of another country is played. Place your right hand over your heart when reciting the Pledge of Allegiance.

Dining Out. The same rules for dining out apply whether going to a coffee shop or a formal restaurant. Treat wait staff like royalty to ensure the best service. Allow the host to seat you. The best seat at a table goes to the guest of honor. Closed menus signal to a server that you are ready to order. After orders are taken, make pleasant conversation until the food is served. Wait for everyone to be served before beginning. When you depart, push in your chair.

Founder and CEO of Beverly Hills Manners, Lisa Gaché is a nationally recognized etiquette coach and lifestyle expert. She provides practical modern day solutions and helps clients use the power of social intelligence to enhance their lives, both personally and professionally.

Featured on national television (The Today Show, Access Hollywood, Dr. Phil) and in print media (USA Today, New York Times, The Hollywood Reporter, The Telegraph), Ms. Gaché received her certification as a Corporate Etiquette and International Protocol Consultant from The Protocol School of Washington along with a mark of distinction from The English Manner in London.

Lisa’s book, Beverly Hills Manners: Golden Rules from the World’s Most Glamorous Zip Code, published November 2014, is the go-to-guide for parents and Saudi princesses, NFL coaches and Oscar nominees. She is currently working on big vision to bring these crucial life tools and social change to the world. For further information, please contact www.beverlyhillsmanners.com.