“Peanuts, Headphones, Restraining Order?” – Navigating the Not So Friendly Skies

By Renowned Beverly Hills Manners Expert Lisa Gaché

For a moment, I thought air travel was making a pleasant return to the good old days. If you were one of the brave souls who took to the air like me during the first twelve months of Covid, you were probably pleasantly surprised by the experience (sans the mask wearing and face shield to ward off any potential contamination of the virus). There were no mile long lines at TSA, you weren’t packed into the plane like sardines, there was plenty of overhead compartment space to store your belongings, and the best part – there were empty seats!

As a child, I always looked forward to getting on a plane going anywhere. I still get chills when I hear the United Airlines theme song, Gershwin's "Rhapsody in Blue," play at the beginning of a flight. It sends me right back to a time when planes were not over-sold, and you had a row all to yourself to stretch out and get comfortable. I vividly recall ample leg room and rows so wide my sister and I were able to play cards on the floor. Airline cuisine was also pretty decent. A steak with a twice-baked potato followed by an ice cream sundae bar complete with hot fudge, whipped crème, nuts and a cherry on top – what’s not to love!?

But all good things come to an end and this summer the flood gates opened and then some! Everyone was ready to fly again – cooped up families with kids, business travelers desperate to get back on the road, thrill seekers searching for their next big adventure. And, according to the FAA, passengers are bringing with them a whole lot of unruly behavior. Disruptive incidents are up 500% since 2019 and range from travelers refusing to comply with the federal mask mandate, to starting fist fights with other passengers, biting flight attendants, and even attempting to open the cabin door!

We are living in turbulent times. Gone are the days of getting dressed and gearing up for a gorgeous getaway filled with adventure and possibility. Instead, modern air travel is laden with high-strung, ill-tempered, slovenly commuters whose casual clothing mimics their equally careless attitude. Add to this already precarious situation smaller cabins, fewer seats, and increased regulations due to Covid and it's no wonder everyone's on edge. Emotions run high, and the next thing you know a passenger is in a choke-hold!

Thank you to Jeff Bezos and Richard Branson for opening our eyes to the wonders of space travel, but before we start booking civilian flights to the moon, can we please restore some modicum of civility to air travel here on planet earth? While we may not be able to control the crazies, a primer on how to tame tumultuous situations before they erupt in the sky is certainly worth a try. Here are a few travel etiquette reminders for our enjoyment and our safety when we set soar.

Dress for yourself and fellow passengers. Forget the flip flops and short shorts, be daring and put on something decent for the plane. It is entirely possible to appear quite chic while still being comfortable, plus a nice presentation helps to set the tone for your flight. When it comes to shoes, the easier the better to slip off at the security gate. Don't forget to wear socks. Nothing is worse than stepping barefoot on the airport flooring. Wear deodorant, but go easy on the cologne and perfume. It's a good idea to pack some lip ointment and hand creme to combat dry skin. It never hurts to look your best, especially if you’re single. You never know who will be seated next to you.

Take a chill pill. If you have a severe aversion to standing or waiting in line, do not fly! Unless you have PreCheck, Global Entry or Clear, have hired a special airport greeter or you’re flying business or first, you must be patient and grin and bear the cattle calls. Getting agitated only makes matters worse. Listen to a podcast or crack open a book so you can pass the time passively while waiting to check your bags or go through security. Keep your identification handy, as well as your boarding ticket if you’ve printed a copy. You will be asked to show proof of both repeatedly.

Be prepared for small annoyances. There is no way to avoid the safety ritual of walking through security. Everyone must remove their shoes and jackets and risk a pat down by a security officer. Organize your belongings and place them in the open containers for the x-ray machine. Make sure to separate your laptop in its own container for easy viewing. Remove all jewelry and accessories that may set off the alarm. Toss any bottles of water in the trash and make sure all other liquids, gels or creams are less than 3.4 ounces in weight and placed in a plastic bag for easy viewing.

Avoid confrontation. Please do not attempt to stuff your entire closet into your carry-on luggage. If you cannot lift your bag and place it in the overhead bin on your own, the flight attendant will be forced to help you and may question its size or weight, especially if they see you struggling to jam it into a small compartment. Either pack lighter, check your bag or call a delivery service like FedEx to ship your belongings door to door in advance. It's not worth getting into an argument on this one, the airline always wins.

Respect personal space. In this tube 30,000 ft. in the air, everything is exaggerated. Some people do not wish to engage and prefer keeping quietly to themselves. Be respectful towards those around you and read their signals. (a) If you are bringing your own food, keep it simple. Do not stink up the plane with smelly cheeses or a pungent dish. (b) If someone is reading a book or typing away on a computer, do not engage them in conversation as they may not wish to be disturbed. (c) If you are tired, rest your weary head on your own chair with your blanket and use only one armrest for your arms. (d) Make sure to use the restroom before being seated to avoid musical chairs throughout the flight. (e) Before reclining your seat abruptly, check behind you to give your fellow passenger a heads up. They will appreciate it.

Curb the cell phone conversation. There is nothing that equally worries and annoys fellow passengers and flight attendants alike then someone who chooses to completely ignore the FAA's rule to turn off all cell phones and other electronic equipment during take-off and landing. The jury is still out as to whether the radio signals from these devices can interfere with flying equipment so for the safety of everyone, cut it out and follow the rules!!!

Check yourself, not just your bags. If you are in a bad mood, meditate, do some calming exercises and settle down. The airport and flying experience is hard enough without the reckless behavior. Present a cheerful face, always be courteous saying "hello”, “pardon me”, “please" and "thank you" to both your fellow flyers as well as the flight attendants and be helpful and accommodating. This will smooth over any extenuating circumstance or accidental wrongdoing.

Founder and CEO of Beverly Hills Manners, Lisa Gaché is a nationally recognized etiquette coach and lifestyle expert. She provides practical modern day solutions and helps clients use the power of social intelligence to enhance their lives, both personally and professionally.

Featured on national television (The Today Show, Access Hollywood, Dr. Phil) and in print media (USA Today, New York Times, The Hollywood Reporter, The Telegraph), Ms. Gaché received her certification as a Corporate Etiquette and International Protocol Consultant from The Protocol School of Washington along with a mark of distinction from The English Manner in London.

Lisa’s book, Beverly Hills Manners: Golden Rules from the World’s Most Glamorous Zip Code, published November 2014, is the go-to-guide for parents and Saudi princesses, NFL coaches and Oscar nominees. She is currently working on big vision to bring these crucial life tools and social change to the world. For further information, please contact www.beverlyhillsmanners.com.

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