Beverly Hills Manners - Gifting & Tipping Guidance for a Very Different Holiday Season

by Beverly Hills Manners Expert Lisa Gaché

December is typically a relentless month filled with jam-packed schedules and a list of tasks that bring equal parts joy and a tug at our purse strings. It’s a time where we normally rush around like fiends shopping ‘til we practically drop then collapse on the couch grateful for a moment of peace amid all the chaos.

Nothing about the last nine months has been normal. Our work life and home life blurred into one, weekdays and weekends bared no real distinction, and basically everything else we’ve come to count on is very different this year - even Santa was sidelined by the sudden pandemic! But as they say in Tinseltown, the show must go on and so must the annual challenge of holiday gifting and tipping.

How to express one’s appreciation will be tricky no doubt, especially after we’ve had less contact those who typically provide us with customary services and added new services such as home deliveries to our list since the shutdown. Exactly what to tip or how much to tip may be adjusted but cannot disappear when people are counting on our generosity even during these most unprecedented times.

When tackling the holiday extravaganza, there’s one rule and one rule only: it’s the thought that matters most. Whether you’re flush with cash or forced to tighten your belt this season, take a moment to show someone how much you care. Here’s our take on conscious gifting and tipping at holiday time that is guaranteed to bring heartfelt thanks to all the recipients on your list.

A Written Message Speaks Volumes. We know the gift or tip speaks for itself, but nothing expresses true gratitude more than a well-expressed handwritten note on smart stationery with beautiful penmanship. A gift can be tossed, a tip will be used, but a note may be stored in a drawer forever. Take a moment to share how much you appreciate that special person for helping make your life a little easier, prettier, smoother – you get the drift. A holiday card is an added bonus that warms the heart and puts a smile on someone’s face.

Honor the Recipient. Typically a cash tip is expected for the holidays, especially in the case of a special nanny or babysitter who has taken amazing care of your little ones, a doorman in your building who is exceptionally pleasant and helpful or a private caregiver who has tended to a sick relative day in and day out without complaint. You rely on these individuals for your everyday existence and to offer them a batch of homemade cookies (although tasty) may be sending a message that you do not value their services as much as they thought you did. Err on the side of generous (if you can) and honor your recipient in the way you think they will feel most appreciated.

Research the Alternatives. For some recipients, a large cash tip is not an option, but you still want to convey your appreciation, this is where your creativity will hopefully kick in. There are countless gift cards that make the perfect gifts when cash feels a bit cold or inappropriate. With hundreds of gift cards to choose from, put yourself in the recipient’s shoes and imagine what they would enjoy most. A Starbucks gift card might be just the perfect display of gratitude for a dog walker who can’t live without his morning double shot of espresso with a side of foam and a VISA gift card is ideal for a teacher who may wish to purchase some extra supplies for the classroom and treat herself to a manicure.

When Your Tip is a Gift. Sometimes a gift is an ideal tip at holiday time. If going this route, be sure to shop small and support local businesses who will not only take care of your purchasing needs, but add that special touch that only an in-person experience can provide. A nice bottle of Pinot from the neighborhood wine shop or a beautiful silver bowl filled with nuts and dried fruits from a nearby grocery merchant are wonderful gestures of thanks. Don’t forget to stop by the stationery store and pick up the perfect card to enclose with your gift. If purse strings are more stringent than usual, a jar of homemade jam or a tin of pumpkin bars expertly wrapped with ribbon offers a perfect opportunity for closet chefs and bakers to flaunt their finest talents. If you have children, a small gift specifically from them, such as a winter scarf or a cozy bathrobe, is an added touch that goes a long way for a special nanny or babysitter.

Cash is Still King. Do the best you can, but don’t skip out on the tip. So many service businesses have suffered major financial hardship, the same goes for at-home and childcare workers like caregivers, house cleaners, dog walkers, and day care providers. Everyone is working even harder to make sure safety measures are taken so it’s especially meaningful when we take time to acknowledge these efforts. For a reference on how much to give, please refer to the holiday tipping chart below.

Founder and CEO of Beverly Hills Manners, Lisa Gaché is a nationally recognized etiquette coach and lifestyle expert. She provides practical modern day solutions and helps clients use the power of social intelligence to enhance their lives, both personally and professionally.

Featured on national television (The Today Show, Access Hollywood, Dr. Phil) and in print media (USA Today, New York Times, The Hollywood Reporter, The Telegraph), Ms. Gaché received her certification as a Corporate Etiquette and International Protocol Consultant from The Protocol School of Washington along with a mark of distinction from The English Manner in London.

Lisa’s book, Beverly Hills Manners: Golden Rules from the World’s Most Glamorous Zip Code, published November 2014, is the go-to-guide for parents and Saudi princesses, NFL coaches and Oscar nominees. She is currently working on big vision to bring these crucial life tools and social change to the world. For further information, please contact www.beverlyhillsmanners.com.