IT’S WHO YOU KNOW! By Shelley Stockwell-Nicholas, PhD
IT’S WHO YOU KNOW!
By Shelley Stockwell-Nicholas, PhD
Some say you become like those with whom you spend the most time. This can be debilitating or nourishing. If they are negative and abusive, they can bring you down faster than a kick in the gut. If they are positive and supportive, it’s a smile in your heart. So, who do you spend the most time around?
Yes, you guessed it… YOURSELF!
You're the one you talk with all day long. Who are you talking to? And who answers? You call out a particular YOU for every situation; a serious you, a funny you, a lover you, the silly you, a motivating ambitious you, a lazy you and… maybe even a dreaded purple aspic sabotaging you.It’s natural to have many personas and which one you heed is a choice you make.
Supportive and nourishing sub-sets or sub-personalities are inner best “friends.” So listen well to your inner voices and heed the best advice so you make the best choices. When you become aware and selective of your dominant sub-personalities, life gets better and better. But, what happens if you allow a disruptive inner voice to take over? With friends like this, who needs enemies? So, here is what you can do. First, acknowledge that a limiting character became a part of you to help you cope… Second either retire them or give them a new job description. My limiting character is disruptive and critical. I put him in a child’s seat in the back of my car and invite him into the house when I am editing because he is an eagle eye and stickler for spelling. Who is your limiting character… think about it and strike a deal. Perhaps you can give them a gold watch and retire them to Tahiti.
The point is this: to change any aspect of your life, you may have to change the identity of an aspect of yourself. Shift starts as you pay attention to how you think and how you talk to yourself. Once your inner voices work as a team for your happiness you can spend more time outside yourself and notice the people outside of you. Who are they? Are they real or on television or in books? Do they support your happiness and growth? Or, do they hold you back, pull you down, or deminish you?
If you truly want to be your best, inundate and surround yourself with role models who support you and your gifts. If you want to get in better shape, spend more time with people who are fit. If you want to improve relationships, hang out with those who get along with others. Happiness is a choice that begins inside and outside of you!
Local Personality, Shelley Stockwell-Nicholas, PhD is a hypnotherapist, mindfulness and NLP trainer, artist and the author of 25 books. She certifies practitioners through the International Hypnosis Federation. You can call her at 310 541-4844.